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Sunday, September 16, 2007

Letters To D. Editor

Dude, I grew up in Selinsgrove and went to college at F&M in Lancaster. This is one of the funniest things I have ever seen! You had me laughing so hard today I could barely breathe. Especially like the Katherine Baker Knoll and Rendell digs, he was my commencement speaker and I'll never forgive him for that.
Thanks again, N.L.
You're a good man, N.L., for staying for the speech. Many college students who have been subjected to Rendell commencement speeches have dropped out minutes into them, opting to forego their diplomas rather than sit through the whole thing.

  • no idea who you are, but keep up the good work
  • my friends and I refer to you as the "Harrisburg Onion"....
  • which is intended as a supreme compliment
  • excellent satirical/comedy writing...which we really enjoy
Placement of the bullet points in the email above may seem random and innocent enough at first glance, but I'm convinced they constitute one thing: Secret code from the terrorists. Run, everyone, run. Grab the Cheez Whiz and satellite phone and head to your special hiding places.

Brilliant. Seriously. I'm completely disappointed that I wasn't aware of this site until today. By far the funniest joint in the series of tubes carrying York Springs and Paxtang datelines.
I'm disappointed that you weren't aware of this site, either. I don't follow your last sentence, but given the fact it includes the words "joint" and "tubes," I'll just assume you're high.

How can I go about getting a guide to state park sex spots?
Meet me at sundown tonight at the men's restrooms near Fuller Lake in Pine Grove Furnace State Park. I'll be the fat guy in the second stall from the right with no pants on and a Scott Paterno mask. Yodel the Penn State fight song while shirtless, and I'll slide a copy of the guide out to you. Just tap my foot with yours if you have any questions.